The pre-election feature package is Van Smith on Libertarian gubernatorial candidate Spear Lancaster and anti-Libertarian activist Kevin O’Connell, and Tom Siebert comparing Democratic gubernatorial candidate Kathleen Kennedy Townsend to a fellow scion of a political dynasty, George W. Bush.

In Mobtown Beat, Waris Banks reports on activists’ efforts to have the Baltimore City Council declare the AIDS epidemic a “state of emergency.”

The Nose second-guesses Lynne Cheney’s assessment that Helen Delich Bentley is a “role model for women.”

Charles Cohen’s Charmed Life digs in with Brian Schwartz, whose Fells Point property became an archeological attraction.

Christopher Myers’ How’s it Going? gets answers from Donna Reinsel, Lafayette Gilchrist, and Marcielle Maxim.

The Mail has letters from Leor Galil, Frank Littleton, Rich Goldman, Richard Kolish, Dan Greifenberger, and Wendell Wagner, Jr.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on the gun-rights debate and the Washington sniper; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, on the blur of wartime news; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on sexual harassment.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

In Comics: see Taste Like Chicken, Series 1 & 2, by C. Kang and S. Kang; and Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat.

In Imprints: Mahinder Kingra urges readers not be intimidated by the heft of Michel Faber’s 848-page novel, The Crimson Petal and the White; John Barry likes William Gaddis’ fighting spirit in The Rush for Second Place and Agape Agape; and Ian Grey appreciates how Andrew Vachss’ novel, Only Child, depicts the cruel choices evil makes.

Books is Frank Diller, talking with Brad Watson about how his debut novel. The Heaven of Mercury, makes lit out of hicks.

In Art, Mike Giuliano finds the good and the bad in the Maryland Federation of Art’s annual photo show.

Stage is Anna Ditkoff, trying to understand why the audience likes Karen Gray’s Eleven Ex-Boyfriends Defend Their Actions at Theatre Project.

In Music, Tony Ware gets noisy with Dalek and Isis.

Jason Torres’ No Cover chats with Niela.

Television is Benn Ray, touting Homicon as the last refuge of Homicide: Life on the Streets fans.

In Film: Eric Allen Hatch catches up with Michael Moore, finds Bowling for Columbine important, and gets giddy over Punch-Drunk Love; Joe MacLeod needles Abandon and pukes all over Formula 51 ; and Tom Siebert says Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie is sugary medicine.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore pours it on for La Tesso Tana.

In Cheap Eats, Michelle Gienow says Fresh Fresh Seafood is well worth the wait.

The features are: Ooh, Scary!, CP’s Halloween masks; CP’s endorsements for the general election; and Terrie Snyder on why some murders count more than others.

In Mobtown Beat, Afefe Tyehimba examines a New Shiloh Baptist Church community-development project and Van Smith raises security concerns about computer voting in Maryland and elsewhere.

The Nose peruses a children’s activity book put out by court officials and updates the situation with illegally posted political-campaign signs.

Tom Chalkley’s Charmed Life checks in with St. Frances Community Center director Ralph Moore’s work with the Oblate Sisters of Providence.

The Mail has letters from Jon Parker, Jacqueline Beltrand, Pam Harris, Larnell Custis Butler, Bob Erlandson, and Mike Serene.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on getting out the vote; Suz Redfearn’s Germ Bag, on regrets about childhood meanness; Sandy Asirvatham’s Underwhelmed, on snipers, fear, and repeating history; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on best friends’ boyfriends and kids in a china shop.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

The Comics are C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken and Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat.

Books is Benn Ray, giving props to In the Shadow of Edgar Allan Poe, a hard-bound visual narrative created by Baltimore artists who fancify Poe’s demons.

In Art, Mike Giuliano gets colorful about the BMA’s Rennaisance-art exhibit, Painted Prints, and Blake de Pastino plays up photographer Jack Radcliffe’s subject of a show at Harford Community College’s Chesapeake Gallery.

John Barry’s Stage says Theatre Hopkins production of William Shakespeare’s All’s Well that Ends Well plays it straight.

No Cover is Brett McCabe, welcoming home The Oranges Band from a hellish tour.

In Film: Ian Grey gets punished by Auto Focus and I Spy; Lee Gardner gives Kinetic Sandwich the exposure it deserves and tips a hat to Bloody Sunday; Amy M. Bruce rips up Ghost Ship; Joe MacLeod calls Jackass: The Movie “the American dream”; Eric Allen Hatch says Paid in Full doesn’t pay off; Christopher Skokna lavishes praise on Spirited Away; and Richard Gorelick has fun with The Truth About Charlie.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore is charmed by Café Madrid.

In Cheap Eats, Brennen Jensen tests Hook-Up Restaurant’s recipe for youthful longevity.

Lauren Goldsmith’s photo-feature travels with a busload of Baltimore activists to a peace rally in Washington, D.C.

In Mobtown Beat, Anna Ditkoff tells how Harborplace performer Jerry Rowan’s sniper joke cost him his gig.

The Nose likes the scent of the Baltimore City Council’s anti-war resolution, but not the state of Gertrude Stein’s former residence in Reservoir Hill.

Brennen Jensen’s Charmed Life revisits the long-shuttered Baltimore Coliseum.

Christopher Myers’ How’s it Going? gets answers from Jason Huggins, Anthony Jones, and Janis Stewart.

The Mail has letters from Barbara Karni, Jim Keen, Cathy Brennan, Lorenzo Gaztanaga, Aimee Darrow, B.J. Packett, and Warren Cherry.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on how tax cuts don’t balance budgets; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, on word-counts that pay better; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on pretzel logic and back-stabbers.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

In Comics, C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken takes on racism.

John Barry’s Books finds in Daniel Ellsberg’s memoir, Secrets, compelling lessons about wars the White House wants to fight.

In Art: Blake de Pastino pursues the mysteries of the late Sally Kearsley, prompted by an exhibition of her work at Goucher College’s Rosenberg Gallery; Mike Giuliano goes for the gross at a John Waters solo show at C. Grimaldis Gallery; and Tim Hill pops in on the Bask exhibit at Mission Space.

Stage is: Brennen Jensen, hitching a ride on Jeffrey Hatcher’s Scotland Road; and John Barry, taking the medicine of Rep Stage’s production of Brian Friel’s Faith Healer.

In Feedback, Geoffrey Himes is thrilled to welcome Linda Thompson back to Maryland, where she played an offspring-backed set at Rams Head Tavern.

Bret McCabe’s Music runs down a roster of DJs whose new releases put beat before brain.

In Film: Ian Grey can’t possibly convey the totality of Frida’s horrendousness; and Richard Gorelick announces Brian de Palma’s latest redemption with Femme Fatale, but is not so sanguine about Comedian.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore finds Eggspectation not all it’s cracked up to be.

In Cheap Eats, Tim Hill likes a light lunch at Café di Roma.

Erin Sullivan’s feature profiles the Baltimore-Linwood Community Football League for boys an/ girls.

In Mobtown Beat, Van Smith augurs the future of Baltimore’s three outgoing state senators, Barbara Hoffman, Perry Sfikas, and Clarence Mitchell IV.

The Nose sniffs out Baltimore City voting problems and how the recent elections shook out for Maryland’s third parties.

Charles Cohen’s Charmed Life visits with train photographer Ernie Roberts.

The Mail has letters from Richard Crystal, Karen Tomley, Kim Sanders-Fisher, and Sarah Woods.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on election fallout; Suz Redfearn’s Germ Bag, on visiting her alma mater; Sandy Asirvatham’s Underwhelmed, on the life of a professional musician; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on being a gay chick-magnet and dealing with romantic bullies.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

In Comics, C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken tries oral sex and Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat plays with popcorn.

Susan Muaddi Darraj’s Books piece hopes Atiq Rahimi’s first novel, Earth and Ashes, signals that Afghanis will give the world more literature.

In Art, Bret McCabe plumbs the mail art of “Blaster” Al Ackerman and Blake de Pastino checks out the boxing art of Joseph Sheppard.

Stage is John Barry, trying to like the Vagabond Players’ production of Stephen Mallatratt’s The Woman in Black.

Bret McCabe’s Music listens to Paper Chase learn, and says fans may be jarred by the result.

In Film: Eric Allen Hatch goes to the Maryland Documentary Symposium; Joe MacLeod is surprised to find much to like about 8 Mile; Tom Siebert finds Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets generically competent; and Ian Grey has fun with Rodger Dodger.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore wonders what made Porters Pub and Grille so thoroughly bad.

In Cheap Eats, Christopher Skokna wants more Nepalese dishes at Kitchen of India.

The 2002 /City Paper/ Holiday Guide features: an introduction, profiles of people who work through the holidays, Bret McCabe on holiday music, an Emily Flake advent calendar, and a list of gift ideas.

In Mobtown Beat: Terrie Snyder reports on Baltimore cops on the clock for the Ehrlich campaign; Brennen Jensen profiles a homesteading group in Reservoir Hill; and Van Smith remembers Wagners Point activist Doris McGuigan.

The Nose scoffs at Robert Kurson’s fawning Esquire profile of Baltimore mayor Martin O’Malley.

Tom Chalkley’s Charmed Life visits with cobbler Carlo Griguolo at his throw-back Hamilton shop.

The Mail has letters from Bob Jacobson, Medina Krause, Joyce Lombardi, Mary Chetelat, JoAnne Copes, and Luise Rechen.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on liberal soul-searching after the 2002 elections; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, on grappling with the holidays; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on loveless lust and old-young dating.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

In Comics: C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken shits on love and Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat shoots fish.

Books are: John Barry, delving into porn with Irvine Welsh’s novel,  Porno, and Elisabeth Eaves’ stripper memoir, Bare; and James D. Dilts, on yet another Miles Davis biography, John Szwed’s So What.

In Art, Mike Giuliano goes to see the latest at School 33 Art Center and Blake de Pastino likes Susan Waters-Eller’s paintings, hanging at MICA’s Pinkard Gallery.

Stage is: Tom Siebert, heralding Warren Leight’s playwriting return at Center Stage;  and John Barry, catching the beat of Al Letson’s Essential Personnel.

In Feedback: Bret McCabe enjoys the practiced fun of Paolo Angeli and Mas Alla del Reino de los Sensaciones at the Red Room; and Tina Plottel believes the magic of Sigur Ros at the Lincoln Theatre.

Tony Ware’s Music gets happy with Andy “Mr. Scruff” Carthy.

In Film: Eric Allen Hatch enjoys the mimicry of Far From Heaven and laughs with Monkey Business.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore is surprised to find that Mondo Bondo Italian Bistro dishes up decent, affordable fare with modesty.

In Cheap Eats, Michelle Gienow’s mouth waters for El Salto II.

In the feature hole are Earl Byrd’s story of his hard-fought redemption from drugs and crime and CP’s 2003 Martin O’Malley Calendar.

Ericka Blount Danois’ Mobtown Beat profiles a new natural-foods buying club.

The Nose wrinkles over possible litigation involving the arson murders of the Dawson family and new tactics by debt collectors.

Brennen Jensen’s Charmed Life shares Hampdenite Thom Hook’s theory on how zeppelins could have averted the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor.

Christopher Myers’ How’s it Going? gets answers from Willie Hewalient, John White, and Dan Hill.

The Mail has letters from Laura Carlson, Rachel Emmel, Allison Stelly, Beth Hawks, Mark Hossfeld, Jon Swift, Kendall Alexander, Greg Dembeck, Linda Toast, and Thomas Hook.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on drug prohibition; Suz Redfearn’s Germ Bag, on sports and shopping; Sandy Asirvatham’s Underwhelmed, on organic grocery shopping; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on disabled lovers and young louts.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken tries dog food.

In Books, Mahinder Kingra thinks Stephen E. Ambrose’s To America belies the historian’s rose-colored views and Tom Siebert sees genius in Donna Tartt’s The Little Friend.

Art is: Tim Hill, playing with the art toys of Dynamo Manufacturing Co.; Blake de Pastino, questioning whether a Baltimore Museum of Art photography exhibit, Parallel Tracks, matters; and Mike Giuliano, digesting MICA Remembers 9/11 at the art institute’s Meyerhoff Gallery.

In Stage, John Barry purrs for Everyman Theatre’s production of Edward Albee’s A Delicate Balance; and Josephine Yun enjoys the story-telling of Arena Players’ production of Emily Man’s Having Our Say.

Michaelangelo Matos’ Music samples Minnesota hip-hop.

No Cover is Tom Breihan, ruing the breakup of the Charm City Suicides, and Bret McCabe, chronicling the drama of Mary Prankster’s tour.

In Film: Geoffrey Himes gets with the storied subjects of the music documentary, Standing in the Shadow of Motown; Lee Gardner tries to sort out Solaris; Ian Grey finds that images make The Trials of Henry Kissinger even more compelling than the book it’s based on; Joe MacLeod is okay with the prospect that James Bond will have to Die Another Day and gets exactly what he’s supposed to out of Friday After Next; Eric Allen Hatch finds The Emperor’s Club to be trite, cloistered tripe; and Tom Siebert kicks Half Past Dead in the balls, but finds My Big Fat Greek Wedding to be “pleasantly escapist.”

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore calls City Crab and Seafood Co. a “pleasure-giving honey.”

In Cheap Eats, Brennen Jensen likes the “honest” sandwiches of Gallery Café.

Afefe Tyehimba’s feature chronicles the efforts of Bea Gaddy’s children to keep up their mother’s good works.

In Mobtown Beat, Brennen Jensen tries to get to the bottom of why the renovation of Charles Village’s historic Census Building is bogged down in legal red tape.

The Nose wades into the semantic transgender v. transsexual debate.

Charles Cohen’s Charmed Life retells the civil-rights career of anti-blockbuster Sidney Hollander of Windsor Hills.

The Mail has letters from Alex Polsky, James Harper, Mat Costanzo, Robert Nelson, and Bryn Parchman.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on calling a lie a lie; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, bellyaching; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on break-up sex and your best friend’s sister.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

Chicken doesn’t always taste like chicken, in C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken, while Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat celebrates Saturday night.

In Books: Frank Diller weighs the drug-world hype in Richard Davenport-Hines’ The Pursuit of Oblivion and Stuart Walton’s Out of It, and Susan Muaddi Darraj says the wait for Sandra Cisneros’ Caramelo was worth it.

In Art, Mike Giuliano gets back to nature with the art of Soledad Salame at Gomez Gallery, as does Gadi Dechter, with Carol Hepper’s sculpture at Maryland Institute College of Art’s Decker Gallery.

John Barry’s Stage wanks with Spotlighter’s Theatre’s production of David Cerda’s Rudolph the Red-Hosed Reindeer.

Music is Gadi Dechter, noting the resurrection of Ben Kweller, and Jon Fine, praising the genius of Black Sabbath’s confusion.

In Film: Tom Siebert can’t exactly recommend Eight Crazy Nights, but admits it’s funny; Eric Allen Hatch says Equilibrium “delivers triumphantly”; and Joe MacLeod skis all over Extreme Ops.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore calls The Claddagh Pub “magically delicious.”

In Cheap Eats, Ann Ditkoff likes the cheap sushi at Asian Taste.

Van Smith’s feature analyzes returns in Georgia’s 2002 election, the first in the country to uniformly use computer-based balloting, and finds security concerns relevant to Maryland’s – and the nation’s – voting future.

In Mobtown Beat, Ericka Blount Danois reports on a proliferation of real-estate signs in Edmondson Village.

The Nose gets a jump on the 2004 elections, profiling presidential candidate Jack Grimes of the United Fascist Union.

Tom Chalkley’s Charmed Life tells the story of the Hanover Street Bridge.

Christopher Myers’ How’s it Going? gets answers from Eve Morra, Rick Whitaker, and M. Kim Howard.

The Mail has letters from Bob Erlandson, P. S. Taylor, Rochelle Robinson, Deneen Blocker, Craig Thompson, Laura Carlson, A. Robert Kaufman, Kim Sanders-Fisher, Teresa Carello, and Dianne Feldman.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on the Bush administration’s double-talk; Suz Redfearn’s Germ Bag, on her hubbie’s media success; Sandy Asirvatham’s Underwhelmed, on ethnic ignorance; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on booty callers and disabled lovers.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken riffs on cigs.

In Books, Tom Siebert gets alarmed by C. William Michaels’ treatise about the threat to U.S. civil liberties, No Greater Threat; and Scott Carlson likes how Robert S. Baker and James Sexton’s Aldous Huxley and Christopher Hitchens’ Why Orwell Matters set the record straight about the two British novelists whose ideas have been politically appropriated by all sides.

Art is Gadi Dechter, appreciating a hastily hung show at Mission Space curated by Julie Benoit and Barbara Jean Johnson, and Mike Giuliano, lauding the cultural diversity of Gallery International’s new group show.

Josephine Yun’s Stage enjoys the Baltimore Opera Company’s production of Johann Strauss Jr.’s Die Fledermaus.

Bret McCabe’s No Cover reports that Soul Provider intends to remedy the scene in Baltimore, which doesn’t “have a proper nightlife.”

In Film: Eric Allen Hatch praises Mike Leigh’s return to his roots with All or Nothing and Jean Cocteau’s “supreme imagination” with Beauty and the Beast, but pans Empire; Joe MacLeod shits on Analyze That; and Tom Siebert relegates The Santa Clause 2 to a short life at the malls.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore goes to Greektown and reports back about Greek Town Bakery and Deli, ShamDanai’s Chicken-n-Waffle House, Acropolis Restaurant, and Greek Village Carry-Out.

In Cheap Eats, Christopher Skokna splurges on GlasZ Café in Mount Washington.

City Paper’s 2002 Top Ten issue sums up the year in news, film, music, local music, books, television, art, and stage.

In Mobtown Beat, Terrie Snyder reports how Jamal Abeokuto, the man charged with murdering eight-year-old Marciana Monia Ringo, managed to go free and disappear.

The Nose bounces Anton Keating’s channeling of the late Hyman Pressman and augurs the meaning of shoes strung from overhead power lines.

Brennen Jensen’s Charmed Life catches practice with the Marching Ravens, formerly the Baltimore Colts Marching Band.

The Mail has letters from Beth Feehan, Monica Salazar, and Lynn Williams.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on good ol’ Trent Lott; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, on bolding his own Top 10s; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on pompous presumers and hair-dyers.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken goes cannibalistic.

Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat climbs a mountain.

In Books: Scott Carlson finds in Mark Hertsgaard’s The Eagle’s Shadow a cogent and balanced analysis of why America is hated; and Heather Joslyn learns from John D. Freyer’s All My Life for Sale that materialism can be warm and fuzzy.

Gadi Dechter’s Art is exuberant about the meticulous creativity on display at Whole Gallery’s A Show of the Senses.

In Stage, Anna Ditkoff is puzzled by Theatre Project’s production of Frannie Sheridan’s I Tried to Be Normal.

Music is Jason Torres, profiling local American Idoler Maimouna Youssef, and Michaelangelo Matos, explaining the trajectory of glitch electronica.

Bret McCabe’s Know Your Product capsulizes 2002 releases by notable locals Carly Ptak, Flowers in the Attic, The Educated Consumers, Ink, F. Vattel Cherry, Fertile Ground, The Oxes, and Love Life.

In Film: Ian Grey wishes Gangs of New York had been longer, and says Drumline “fakes it”; Lee Gardner calls The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers “ye olde mess,” but still praises Peter Jackson; Eric Allen Hatch concludes that criticizing Adaptation would be nitpicking, and still loves the original Hollywood version of The Phantom of the Opera; Amy M. Bruce fluffs up Maid in Manhattan and is forgiving of Real Women Have Curves’ flaws; Joe MacLeod confronts Star Trek: Nemesis with the awful truth; and Tom Siebert is gracious to The Wild Thornberrys Movie.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore says Thai Arroy does well at filling a Federal Hill niche.

In Cheap Eats, Michelle Gienow happily insists that Women’s Industrial Exchange is Baltimore’s oldest restaurant.

The 2002 People Who Died issue salutes comics artist John Buscema, album-cover artist Mati Klarwein, movie reviewer Howard Thompson, Barbie creator Ruth Handler, Nancy Drew writer Mildred Benson, father of the Frisbee Ed Headrick, country songwriter Mickey Newbury, Uzi engineer Uziel Gal, and gay-activist iconoclast Harry Hay.

Brennen Jensen’s Mobtown Beat profiles mass-transit big-thinker Edward Cohen.

The Nose reveals the role of Sean Malone in Baltimore police commissioner Edward Norris’ departure to head the Maryland State Police, and discusses the ouster of Mike Gimbel as Baltimore County’s drug czar.

Charles Cohen’s Charmed Life tips a hat to Druid Hill Park’s distinctive, historic Osage orange tree.

Christopher Myers’ How’s it Going? gets answers from Luke Durant, Charles Collier, and Santa Ed.

The Mail has letters from Christina Mitchko, James Harper, Alexandra Macchi, Fabio Romerio, and Michelle “Shellers” Herring.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on tax cuts and the poor; Suz Redfearn’s Germ Bag, on when the cat caught on fire; Sandy Asirvatham’s Underwhelmed, on her last column; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on parenting porn and shy moves.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken demonstrates the taste chain.

In Art, Mike Giuliano gets dark with Noir, an exhibit at Villa Julie College.

John Barry’s Stage praises Pumpkin Theatre’s production of Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Weber’s Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

Michaelangelo Matos mashes up 2 Many DJs in Music.

Blake de Pastino’s Television digs on Maryland Public Television’s arts programming.

In Film: Ian Grey thinks Antwone Fisher is woefully over-simplistic; Eric Allen Hatch says Rabbit-Proof Fence suffices, but barely so; Tom Siebert finds Catch Me If You Can a perfectly executed holiday gift; and Richard Gorelick has no love for a bland Chicago and calls Two Weeks Notice just plain lazy.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore yawns at Hunan Szechuan.

Tom Chalkley’s feature looks at changes afoot in Waverly.

In Mobtown Beat, Ericka Blount Danois reports on community damages wrought by Allen Becker’s predatory real-estate practices in Baltimore.

The Nose second-guesses the appointment of Gary McLhinney as head of the Maryland Transportation Authority Police.

Tom Chalkey’s Charmed Life muses on murals depicting old Baltimore.

The Mail has letters from Daisha Lyell, David Robinson, and Rafe Pilgrim.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on Robert Byrd’s racist past; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on Orioles shortstop Deivi Cruz; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong Microsoft-Word-AutoSummarizes all prior columns; Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye debuts; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on bargain hunters and doubting fiancés.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken skunks the posh set.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball plays dead with the New Year.

Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy With a Hat goes fishing.

In Books, Susan Muadi Darraj explains how Laura Wexler researched and wrote Fire in a Canebrake: The Last Mass Lynching in America.

Bret McCabe’s Music pays a visit to the brain of Devendra Barnhart.

In Film, Richard Gorelick appreciates the sincerity of About Schmidt.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore sees signs of promise at Mandoragora.

In Cheap Eats, Brennen Jensen gets casual at George’s on Mt. Vernon Square.

Ericka Blount Danois’ feature profiles the Featherstones, a family of Baltimore music makers.

In Mobtown Beat, Waris Banks reports on financial straits at the Baltimore-based Black Educational AIDS Project.

The Nose gives voice to an effort to give Dundalk some respect.

Brennen Jensen’s Charmed Life trumpets big-band radio man Ken Jackson.

The Mail has letters from Joe Stewart, Myles Hoenig, Douglas Womack, Mavro Daffne, and Aimee England.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on American political symbols; Suz Redfearn’s Germ Bag, on passing the Christmas torch; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on making sports-wise New Year’s resolutions; Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye, on true holiday fun; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on gay rumors and wedding planning.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken tries out the anal probe.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball responds inappropriately.

In Art, Gadi Dechter surveys what’s hanging at Angelfall Studio’s fourth group show.

Bret McCabe’s Music explains an ambitious free-form orchestra project soon to be unleashed in Baltimore.

In Film: Lee Gardner is gripped by The Pianist; Ian Grey is disappointed by Narc, but downright aghast at Evelyn; and Luisa F. Ribeiro is surprised that another Nicholas Nickleby actually works.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore heartily raises a glass to Henry’s Bistro.

In Cheap Eats, Anna Ditkoff indulges affordably at Desert Café.

Nicole Leistikow’s feature reports from Kenya on the Baraka School.

In Mobtown Beat, Brennen Jensen explores the format change at Towson University’s public-radio station, WTMD-FM 89.7.

The Nose welcomes CP co-founder Russ Smith’s reunion with Baltimore and announces that Fells Point’s Chat Street is for sale.

Charles Cohen’s Charmed Life catches up with aging Baltimore boxer “Jewel Box Joe” Bukowski.

Christopher Myers’ How’s it Going? gets answers from Andre Waters, Sean Jankowski, and Captain Paul Mueller.

The Mail has letters from Mark Chalkley, Jim Kraft, Adam Cooke, Donald Holland, Raymond Winbush, Dan Krovich, Mary Nisbet, April Smith, and Bella Chou.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on Parris Glendening; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on Eddie Murray getting voted into the Hall of Fame; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, on what readers are writing; Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye, on media coverage of conflict in the Middle East; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on lazy husbands and newly single neighbors.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken tries more anal probe.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball imagines the other little engines.

Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat goes to Mexico.

In Imprints: Patrick Sullivan finds hope in playwright Dael Orlandersmith’s Yellowman/My Red Hand, My Black Hand; James D. Dilts dubs Ashley Kahn’s A Love Supreme a “worthy glimpse” of John Coltrane’s creation; Susan Domagalski enjoys the party Julian Barnes throws with Something to Declare.

Blake de Pastino’s Art tours the Scholl Collection of photographs at the Contemporary Museum.

Bret McCabe, in No Cover, catches up with Cass McCombs and shadows Oji Morris and Brian Pope, former hosts of WEAA’s Underground Experience.

In Film: Luisa F. Ribeiro calls The Hours a “Hollywood rarity” that brings a complex novel to the screen; Tom Siebert skewers Just Married and Kangaroo Jack; and Bret McCabe says 25th Hour ends up “coming up empty.”

Cheap Eats is Christopher Skokna, digging into dessert at Baugher’s, but not so hot on the rest of the menu.

The photofeature, Van Smith and Jefferson Jackson Steele’s Benchmark, uses Census data for areas around Baltimore’s “Greatest City in America” public benches to prompt reflection on Baltimore’s realities.

In Mobtown Beat, Brennen Jensen examines the Citizens Planning and Housing Association’s hiring of Michael Sarbanes as executive director, and Van Smith dissects the underfunded “vision” of developer Charles Jeffries.

The Nose questions the redemption of Little Melvin Williams in federal court, and chills out at an anti-war rally in Washington, D.C.

Tom Chalkley’s Charmed Life beats a path to the Windsor Hills home of drum-maker John Millen.

The Mail has letters from Scott Loughrey, Ernest Hochschild, Norris Walker, Jeff Sattler, Rebecca McMackin, and Joe Roman.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on why Richard Gephardt, Hillary Clinton, and Al Sharpton will never be president; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on Maryland v. Duke in college basketball; Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye, on Shannon Holmes’ novel, B-More Careful; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on overcoming sisterliness and leaving sugar-daddies.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

C. Kang and S. Kang’s Taste Like Chicken tries hair.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball draws codependency.

John Barry’s Books says taking on James Kelman’s “annoying, scary, provocative” novel, Translated Accounts, is a worthwhile endeavour.

In Art, Mike Giuliano approves of the juvenile delinquency of Lisa Dillin, Ming-Yi Sung, and Tabatha Tucker, on display at Maryland Art Place.

John Barry’s Stage endorses Vagabond Players’ production of John Klein’s Dimly Perceived Threats to the System.

In Feedback, Geoffrey Himes gets groovy with John Mooney at Rams Head Tavern.

Bret McCabe’s No Cover charts the outrageous ambitions of Hamdpen’s MC Prince Charming Chazz.

In Film: Ian Grey goes comatose over Talk to Her; Richard Gorelick completely buys into Confessions of a Dangerous Mind; Bret McCabe survives to tell about the hell of A Guy Thing; and Joe MacLeod nails National Security.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore recommends Carlyle Club for Valentine’s Day.

In Cheap Eats, Michelle Gienow commends the coffee-house fare of A Common Ground.

Erin Sullivan’s feature profiles the lonely efforts of Vaughn Vigil and Bryan Taylor to rid their Madison Ave. neighborhood of drug-dealing.

In Mobtown Beat, Ericka Blount Danois explains the risks of tax-refund loans and Brennen Jensen remembers Esther Martin, owner and founder of the venerable Club Charles.

The Nose gets the skinny on the musical chairs at the helm of the Baltimore police department, and leaves a message for President Bush.

Brennen Jensen’s Charmed Life plays tourist in Dundalk.

Christopher Myers’ How’s it Going? gets answers from Kristen Anchor, Benard Lyons, and Paige McIntyre.

The Mail has letters from Bill Fitzgerald, Medina Krause, Katie Lambert, and Fred Longhenry.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on the return of supply-side economics; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, going all stream of consciousness over Super Bowl XXXVII; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, on Super Bowl Roman Numeral Whatever; Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye, on Baltimore’s underfunded school system; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on gay break-ups and the spay/neuter blues.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball catches a guilt trip.

In Imprints: Tom Siebert is bored by Bill Powell’s real-life spy saga, Treason; and Mahinder Kingra learns much from Samuel Fuller’s autobiography, A Third Face, and finds Jane Stevenson’s novel, The Winter Queen, to be “sweeping yet intimate.”

Art is Gadi Dechter, feeling deeply the photographs at Ann Fessler’s exhibit, Everlasting, and Mike Giuliano, praising Works on Paper 2003, a national juried exhibition by Goya-Girl Press and Contemporary Gallery.

Brennen Jensen’s Stage hangs out with Company Thirteen, a plucky young theatre group based in Northeast Baltimore’s Hamilton neighborhood.

No Cover is Jaye Hunnie, letting Parts Unknown (P/X) show how hip-hop can be fun again.

In Film: Tom Siebert says Darkness Falls is not a scary movie; and Joe MacLeod has already had enough of Shanghai Knights.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore channels James Joyce to describe his most excellent visit to James Joyce Irish Pub and Restaurant.

In Cheap Eats, Erin Sullivan raises a meat-greased stein in celebration of Blob’s Park (Max Blob’s Bavarian Biergarten).

Afefe Tyehimba’s feature explores the African-American reparations question with author Raymond Winbush, while W.E. Earle’s delves into Baltimore’s scandalous history with smallpox vaccination.

In Mobtown Beat, Ericka Blount Danois reports on Baltimore’s budding martial-arts community of capoeira ethusiasts.

The Nose stumbles upon an effort to have the 1700 block of North Charles Street named after Esther Martin, the late founder/owner of Club Charles.

Charles Cohen’s Charmed Life retells some Baltimore love stories.

The Mail has letters from Ron Smith, Jack Livingston, and Bill Resh.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, annotating President Bush’s state of the union address; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on an all-star starting spot for Michael Jordan; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on multi-party love-life complications.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball finds a new kind of hell.

In Books, Frank Diller buys into Alisa Quart’s Branded: The Buying and Selling of Teenagers.

Blake de Pastino’s Art piece predicts self-defeat for Baltimore celebration of Russian art, Vivat!.

In Stage, Josephine Yun gives high marks to Arena Players’ production of Alice Childress’ Trouble in Mind.

In Music, Michael Alan Goldberg profiles a prolific workaholic: Henry Rollins.

Know Your Product is Bret McCabe on new releases by Radiant Pig, ResiNation, and Uncle Joe’s Funeral.

In Film: Tom Siebert isn’t buying The Recruit, grins wide for Biker Boyz, and accepts Final Destruction 2 on its own terms.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore confirms that Henninger’s Tavern is as good as he remembered.

In Cheap Eats, Tim Hill finds Perring Place to be merely adequate.

Van Smith’s feature goes deep inside the bars of Curtis Bay.

In Mobtown Beat, Erin Sullivan reports on the debate over the future of the Charles Village Benefits District.

The Nose tracks Baltimore City Council squabbles over a bill to allow property condemnation for industrial redevelopment.

Charles Cohen’s Charmed Life gets the lowdown on Oles Envelope Corp.

Christopher Myers’ How’s it Going? gets answers from Mark Hodges, Tony Tochterman, and Mark Miller.

The Mail has letters from Robert J. Kogan, B. Brestel, and Diana Froley.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on the debate over Maryland’s gun laws; Suz Redfearn’s Germ Bag, on a scary weekend getaway at a remote cabin; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on what it means when pitchers and catchers report; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, on too much teevee; Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye, on scaled-down dreams from Baltimore’s mean streets; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on giving exes gifts and dating in the Internet Age.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball tries to diagnose depression.

Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat goes to Iceland.

In Books, Lizzie Skurnick profiles porn-champion smut-writer Hanne Blank.

Blake de Pastino’s Art piece probes the work of Laura Amussen on display at Galerie Francoise.

In Stage, John Barry likes the energy of Fells Point Corner Theatre’s production of Anton Chekhov’s Three Sisters.

In Music, Tony Ware explains the anti-fashion ambitions of Ladytron.

No Cover is Geoffrey Himes, profiling the ukulele-wielding power of Carmaig de Forest.

In Film: Ian Grey profiles producer Phillip Noyce and praises Noyce’s recent release, The Quiet American; Brett McCabe declares Deliver Us from Eva to be just this side of “rote idiocy”; Amy M. Bruce suggests money spent seeing How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days is wasted; and Tom Siebert suggests the same about The Jungle Book 2.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore finds that Della Note defies gaudy expectations with good food and a fine atmosphere.

In Cheap Eats, Christopher Skokna says IKEA Restaurant beats mall food.

Anna Ditkoff’s Club Review dubs Spy Club good at faux.

Alejandro Danois’ feature profiles Butch Beard, men’s basketball head coach at Morgan State University.

The photo-feature by Kent Bye and Uli Loskot focuses on three war-related events: the “Bomb Saddam Party” at the Thunder Dome in Brooklyn and anti-war rallies in Washington, D.C., and Mondawmin Mall.

In Mobtown Beat, Waris Banks examines Maryland’s lacking inmate-education program and Van Smith covers growing skepticism about computerized voting.

The Nose plumbs Mobtown’s Wire-related image problem, courtesy of then-City Council President Sheila Dixon.

Brennen Jensen’s Charmed Life goes aboard the U.S.S. Zuni/Tamaroa.

The Mail has letters from Morgan Allyn and Cathy Brennan.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on the scarily over-reaching Domestic Security Enhancement Act of 2003; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on strength-and-conditioning coach Kurtis Shultz; and Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye, on Martin Bashir bashing Michael Jackson.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball fails at magic.

Art is Bret McCabe, relating to Nayland Blake’s video art, on display at University of Maryland, Baltimore County’s Center for Art and Visual Culture.

Anna Ditkoff’s Stage gets inside Center Stage’s First Look series, which presents new work by unfamiliar artists.

Feedback is Josephine Yun, obsessing over obsessions at the Peabody Conservatory’s Peabody Trio program.

Jon Fine’s Music piece effuses over Mission of Burma’s reunion.

In Film: Tom Siebert is less than impressed by Gods and Generals; Eric Allen Hatch calls Dark Blue an “American police drama,” and finds Ninotchka a Cold War satire ahead of its time; Joe MacLeod calls Daredevil better than your average super-hero flick; and Luisa F. Ribeiro doesn’t buy The Life of David Gale.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore says Geckos offers really good inauthentic Tex-Mex.

In Cheap Eats, Michelle Gienow likes the belly-dancers at Amer’s Cafe enough to forgive the so-so food.

City Paper’s 2003 Eat guide features Michael Yockel on Slow Food Baltimore, Springfield Farm, La Scala’s cannolis, Calvert’s Gift Farm, and Route 11 Potato Chips, plus a whole suit of dieting ideas – the City Paper Diet, the Halogen Diet, the Duchess of Windsor Diet, the Summer of Love Diet, the Bernie Carbo Diet, the Buffy the Calorie Slayer Diet, the Restaurant Risk Diet, the Bachelorette’s Rules Diet, the Mr. Rogers Diet, the Diminishing Returns Diet, the Edwin Mulitalo/Jonathan Ogden Diet, the Betamax Diet, and the “I’ll have a Lite Beer ‘Cause I’m Watching my Weight” Diet.

In Mobtown Beat, Terrie Snyder unearths why A’shia Jenkins’ murder may never be prosecuted and Anna Ditkoff reports on dangerous piles of dumped snow in West Baltimore.

The Nose explores how to pay for snow removal, mulls over why not all community-benefits districts are created equal, and observes junkie behavior during the massive Presidents Day snowstorm.

Charles Cohen’s Charmed Life gets fashionable with Travis Winkey.

The Mail has letters from Megan Hamilton, John Irwin, Katie Brennan, and Joshua Darlington.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on the prospect of slot-machine gambling in Maryland; Suz Redfearn’s Germ Bag, on public speaking; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on what Baltimore sports fans will give up for Lent; Joe MacLeod’s Mr. Wrong, on too many doughy para-pizza products; Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye, on the Sigma Pi Phi fraternity, and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on ditchers and cheating bosses.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

Emily Flake’s Lulu Eightball chugs some pride.

Smell of Steve, Inc.’s Ziggy with a Hat goes sideways.

In Imprints: Patrick Sullivan wishes Dominick Jenkins’ The Final Frontier had been better; Susan Domagalski extols the work ethic demonstrated by In Code, by Sarah Flannery and David Flannery; and Frank Diller wants more from Lewis Robinson, after reading Officer Friendly and Other Stories.

Art is Gadi Dechter, profiling Area 405.

In Stage, John Barry announces the Baltimore arrival of The Lysistrata Project and Brennen Jensen laughs with Mobtown Players’ production of Werner Trieschmann’s You Have to Serve Somebody.

No Cover is Tom Breihan, giving Double Dagger a promotional stab.

Tony Ware’s Music piece pounces on DJ Tiga.

In Film: Michael Yockel thrills over Anne Watts and Boister scoring old movies; Tom Siebert is totally disappointed with Cradle 2 the Grave; Eric Allen Hatch calls Divine Intervention “beautiful,” says Lost in La Mancha should be required viewing for aspiring filmmakers, and urges everyone to go see Metropolis on the big screen; Joe MacLeod says Old School is a waste; and Ian Grey is appropriately wowed by Russian Ark.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore casts Davinder Singh of India Tandoor as a “Morris Martick for the 21st century.”

In Cheap Eats, Wendy Ward loves The Dizz.

Van Smith’s feature, with John Ellsberry’s photo-feature, celebrates the 50th anniversary of Joseph Stalin’s death by showcasing Lithuania’s Grutas Park, better known as Stalin World.

In Mobtown Beat, Erin Sullivan looks at legislative efforts to reduce Maryland’s prison population and Brennen Jensen covers Baltimore’s anti-war activists.

The Nose gets the skinny on cab drivers’ access to Baltimore hotel restrooms.

Tom Chalkley’s Charmed Life jumps on the opportunity to visit with a reclusive, extreme collector.

The Mail has letters from Scott Huffines, Riddell Noble, James Aguirre, Shane Tanzymore, Karen Pettapiece, Mary Giunca, Allan Maurer, Eric Weinstein, and Tara Abbey.

The columns are: Brian Morton’s Political Animal, on the the racial politics of slot machines in Maryland; Eddie Matz’ Shirts and Skins, on legendary basketball coach Jim Phelan; Afefe Tyehimba’s Third Eye, on hip-hop’s unrealized political potential; and Mink Stole’s Think Mink, on snobby moms and ex-wife issues.

Scocca & MacLeod’s proto-blog, Funny Paper, reads the comics so you don’t have to.

Art is Tim Hill on The Door and Window Project in the Station North Arts District and Blake de Pastino on Judith Godwin’s paintings on display at Towson University’s Holtzman Art Gallery.

John Barry’s Stage lauds Josh Kornbluth’s Ben Franklin Unplugged.

Feedback is Tom Breihan, catching the last show at the Bloodshed Collective’s Mount Vernon warehouse: the Out of the Ashes Festival.

In Music, Bret McCabe levels some criticism at Godspeed You! Black Emperor and Melissa Flanzraich and Bret McCabe assess the status and prospects of Baltimore’s DIY venues.

Film is Eric Allen Hatch on I Know Where I’m Going!.

Richard Gorelick’s Omnivore digs into the exotic at HanAhReum Asian Mart/Mannarang.

In Cheap Eats, Anna Ditkoff bellies up to Mike’s Place.